Is Anyone on Fire?

When things are all chaos and crazy, I sometimes stop for a minute and assess... Is anyone on fire? Is anyone bleeding? Is anyone having trouble breathing? If I can answer these questions no, then I know that I have time. I can think about what I want to do next. I can count to 10. I can let them cry for one minute while I collect myself. Nothing tragic will happen and I can proceed at a pace that is comfortable for me.

Not only do I want to have an opportunity to get things under control, but I also want to be a good role model and show that sometimes regaining your calm and taking your time is the best approach. Sometimes you can think before you react. Whatever it is that is so upsetting will probably be less upsetting about a deep breath and a count to 10. After all, no one is on fire.

I am not one of the moms who says she loves the chaos of childhood. I think things to be calm and organized and systematic. Are there moms who really love chaos or are they pretending because they don't know how to make the chaos stop? Sometimes you have to laugh or to try and join in the chaos to keep your sanity, but I also think it's OK to let your family know that you are up to your limit and that you need a break and that it's time for things to settle down.

I sometimes remind myself that I am Rachel and Kate's primary role model. Do I want them to grow up thinking that they have to put their own happiness and comfort aside for that of their children? Sort of. But not entirely. They will parent the way I do and that helps inspire me to parent as best I can.