To Sleep Perchance to Dream

I've been a night owl as long as I can remember.  When I was in high school I had a 12 inch black and white TV on a little table near my bed.  I would stay up every night watching reruns of the Andy Griffith Show and Planet of the Apes until they played The National Anthem and went off air.  (People born after the 80s will have to ask someone older what it meant when a TV station went off air.)  When TV was done, I would read novels until my eyes burned with dry, tired longing for darkness.  Around 3:30 or 4:00 a.m., I'd finally go to sleep for a few hours.

On the weekends I'd sleep in and sometimes I'd nap after school in the afternoons.  I must have gotten enough sleep somehow because I managed to grow up healthy.  In college I started to be more interested in the purpose of sleep and what happens while one is sleeping.  I took a few classes and read a lot of books.  I learned a lot about what our bodies do while we sleep and why we dream.  

I continued to appreciate my late nights, but as I got older I found more and more of my friends frustrated with sleepless nights and insomnia.  In an effort to be helpful, I made a list of sleep tips.  

1)  It might seem obvious, but cut out caffeine.

2)  Go to bed and get up around the same time every day.  Your body wants to be on a routine.  Force yourself to go to bed and wake up within a 1 hour window every day.  Your body will adjust to that schedule. 

3)  Try a journal.  If you are having intense or weird dreams or nightmares, try journaling about your day.  Wright down what you did and all the random thoughts floating around in your head.  The very act of writing them down, will help your brain organize the thoughts into more manageable chunks before you fall asleep.

4)  Keeping a journal will also help you clear your head of cluttering thoughts, to do lists, and stress.

5)  Do something relaxing.  Deep breathing, a warm bath, stretch, or meditate.

6)  Make your room a comfy sanctuary for sleep.  Remove distractions - especially those that cause stress.

My daughters are night owls too.  I choose to embrace and appreciate that we have that in common rather than fight against it.  Using observations and charts, I found their natural sleep time based on when their bodies and minds got tired.  And that became bed time.  It took some adjusting on both our parts.  

We have some of our best talks and funnest family time in the evenings as we all come home from busy days and activities.  And, since we all enjoy going to bed later, we can all enjoy sleeping in on weekends.  Some of our best warm snuggle moments are in those lazy mornings long after then sun has climbed into the sky.

Halloween Costume List

Rachel's Halloween Costumes:

1998: Scarecrow

1999: Yellow M & M

2000: Tasmanian Devil

2001: Shrek

2002: Army Man

2003: Mermaid

2004: Ghost Bride

2005: Whoopie Cushion

2006: Ghost / Zombie with Black Hood

2007: Candy Corn

2008: Pirate

2009: Minnie Mouse

Kate's Halloween Costumes:

2005: Pumpkin

2006: Cheetah Cat

2007: Pink Princess

2008: White Dress Snow Princess

2009: Classic Black Hat Witch

Morning Sickness Remedies

During both my pregnancies I was really nauseous for about 8 months. I threw up regularly - often several times a day. I developed a habit of carrying plastic zip lock bags in my pockets and developed a lot of skill at pulling them out and vomiting quickly without getting any on my clothes.

One source of my nausea seemed to be my prenatal vitamins. I tried dozens of brands and they all made me nauseous. I found it helpful to take the vitamin when I was already in bed, almost asleep. That way it was working while I was asleep and less aware of they yucky feeling in my belly. With Kate I just had to stop taking them 1/2 way through the pregnancy.


I tried a couple different prescription medications that were supposed to curb the nausea. The both left me feeling worse. Still nauseous with a list of other complaints as long as my arm.

Following is a list of things I did to help with Morning Sickness (at any time of day). I found that sometimes one would work for a few days and then another for the next few days. Another week something that didn't work before would work at a different time. Bottom line - you may want to try a remedy more than once as the weeks go by. Good luck!

- The Liquid from a Can of Peaches in Heavy Syrup Just drain the liquid into a plastic container and keep it in the fridge. When you feel nauseous, take a spoonful and try to swallow it in a gulp, not sips. It will stay fresh a few days.

- Weak Ginger Tea at Room Temperature

- Oyster Crackers, try letting them dissolve on your tongue

- Preggie Pops, these are lollipops that help with morning sickness. You can find them at http://www.onestepahead.com/ which is also a great web site for many other products.

- Lemon, You can sniff a fresh lemon or lick fresh lemon slices. You also can try sliced fresh lemon in room temperature water.

- Dry Cereal, Especially slightly sweet children's cereal that is vitamin fortified. I suggest Corn Pops and Fruit Loops.

Dedications

Here's a list of songs that were either "dedicated" to me (by some one on the radio or a mix tape or similar venue) and songs that I wished would be dedicated to me. You can guess which ones are which, but I can't promise I'll reveal the answers.

1. Jack and Diane by John Mellencamp
2. Sweet Child o' Mine by Guns n' Roses
3. Follow Me by Uncle Kracker
4. You're the Inspiration by Air Supply
5. Two Out of Three Ain't Bad by Meatloaf
6. Wouldn't Have Missed it for the World by Ronnie Milsap
7. Melt with You by Modern English
8. Always on my Mind by Pet Shop Boys
9. Kiss the Rain by Billie Myers
10. Walls by Tom Petty
11. Don't You Forget About Me by Simple Minds
12. Mr. Brightside by The Killers
13. Fire and Rain by James Taylor
14. How Deep is Your Love by The Bee Gees
15. You Give Love a Bad Name by Bon Jovi
16. Everybody Loves Me Baby by Don McLean
17. Breakfast at Tiffany's by Deep Blue Something
18. I Still Haven't Found What I'm Looking For by U2
19. Wind Beneath my Wings by Bette Midler
20. You Oughta Know by Alanis Morissette

Handy Guide to Lice

Unfortunately, I've become a lice expert. Never having had lice as a child, I learned as a mom how complicated and labor intensive removing those little bugs can be.

The first thing to do is establish if your child (or you) actually has lice. Don't use the special shampoo unless you actually see lice (bugs). It doesn't work on the eggs and you aren't supposed to use it more than once every 10 days. If you use it before you have actual lice, then you will be using it again when the eggs hatch and that's not good for little children's heads.

1) Check for lice by getting under a good light and going through the hair strand by strand (plan on taking an hour for short hair and several hours for long hair) looking for lice (bugs) or eggs (nits). The bugs look like bugs. You can google them and look at pictures, but if you find any bugs at all - assume they are lice and treat as such. The eggs look like little dandruff flakes, but they stick to the hair, you can't brush them away with your fingers.

2) If you find eggs, clip out the strand of hair with toe nail clippers and put the strand, with the egg attached, in a zip lock bag. It's better to clip out the hair than to try and remove the egg because the eggs stick to the hair and by the time you pull it loose, you could loose it in the rest of the hair. It's easier to clip out.

3) If you don't find any eggs, keep checking every day for 10 - 14 days. Check every strand of hair twice a day for eggs. The eggs are microscopic at first, so you have to keep checking so you can cut them out when they are big enough to see, but before they hatch. An hour or two a day for two weeks seems like a lot, but you want to get the eggs early and wipe things out fast.

4) Tea tree oil shampoo is a good preventative shampoo. The bugs can't climb on greasy, oily hair. So, if you use some tea tree oil shampoo that will help prevent a lice outbreak. Also, don't wash hair too often. Maybe once a week or once every 10 days.

5) Wash everything (clothes, bedding, etc.) in your house in the washing machine. And dry it. You need the heat to kill the eggs. I take everything out of every dresser and wash it all because you never know if an egg fell off a head into a drawer. Wash the floors. Vacuum the furniture and the interior of the car.

6) Anything that can't be washed or vacuumed, needs to be quarantined for two weeks. I section off a room of the house and fill it with stuffed animals, comforters, and furniture that I'm not able to clean. I leave it all in there for two weeks.

7) If you see actual lice, follow the same procedures, but use the the special lice shampoo and treatment gel. You can get it at any drug store. We've used Nix, Rid, and the Walgreens brand. Had similar results with each.

8) The shampoo has directions and so you can refer to that, but just be sure to keep up the checking for eggs. Once you kill the bugs with the shampoo, you'll want to get all those eggs by checking every day. Otherwise, you'll just keep repeating over and over.

9) If you can't get rid of the lice after a few rounds, you may want to consult a professional. There are services you can use that will come de-louse your child or your house. There are salons where you can take your child to have their head checked and the nits removed. These options are expensive, but you might find it worth the price.

10) There is also a prescription shampoo you can get from your pediatrician if none of the above works. It's really strong and they'll want you to try everything else first, but we had to use the prescription once. It's basically a liquid that smells like kerosene and has pages of warning information with it. You put it on for 8 - 10 hours and eventually you sort of get used to the smell. I guess it kills everything. It's pretty intense.

When we got to the pediatrician's office we were told they were having an emergency and that we'd have to wait. We waited in an exam room for 30 minutes. I cried most of the time. When the pediatrician came in, she said, "I know you won' t take this the wrong way, but you look worse than that emergency mom we just had."

Feel free to e-mail me if you need any help. It's labor intensive, but you can get rid of it in one sweep if you are really careful. On two occasions we were able to get rid of everything in one round.

Good luck.

Things I've Done that Didn't Ruin My Kids

Every family does things a little differently and it's often easy to judge something as wrong because it's different from what you do at home. The funny thing is that there's no magic formula for doing everything right. Sometimes the things you thought would be the most helpful didn't make a difference at all. Sometimes you see children who seem to have the most alarming home lives go on to accomplish greatness. Are they stronger because of the challenges they faced? Who knows. The only guarantee is that there are no guarantees...

1) Not having a birthing plan.
When I was pregnant the first time, everyone told me I needed a birthing plan. Books, friends, doctors. I made an elaborate plan that had alternative choices for a variety of unexpected situations. I reviewed the plan with my doctor. Then Rachel arrived on an unexpected day at an unexpected time. Everything that could get mixed up, got mixed up. My doctor wasn't available and the delivery doctor was a stranger. I was in so much pain I'd forgotten I had a delivery plan. And yet, perfect baby. Perfect little girl.

When I got pregnant the second time I had a different doctor. I said, "Should we talk about a birthing plan?" He said, "Oh, are you having the kind of baby that follows a plan?" He's really smart.

I think it's a great idea to talk about all your birthing options and to talk with your doctor and family about what you envision the delivery being like. Other than that, I think a plan is unnecessary.

2) Co-Sleeping
We bought a crib. The intention was that our baby sleep in the crib. Babies don't really care about plans or intentions. Rachel slept more soundly for a longer period of time if she was near someone - right up next to someone. In her crib she would wake up after 1 1/2 hours and play happily for a long time. We couldn't establish any kind of schedule.

We co-slept with Rachel until she was about 3 and then off and on for another two years. She was happy. She slept well. I got to sleep. It worked out fine. She's still a bit of a night owl, but she sleeps well.

3) Clorox Wipes Washing
One day Kate pooped in the bath tub. I scooped her out of the water fast, but the poop-contaminated water had already touched her body. It was the kind of poop the was all crumbly and was immediately broken down by the movement of the water. There was poop all over the tub and all over the tub toys. In order to re-wash Kate, I was going to have to first wash out the whole tub.

I grabbed a Clorox Wipe (the kind used for cleaning bathroom surfaces) and wiped her off. She was then sanitary and clean. My mother was appalled! Clorox is not meant for baby skin. I agree. But, it was an emergency. It's been several years. She's fine.

4) Watching Too Much TV
My brother and I grew up watching too much TV. We turned out fine. We both have great jobs and great families. We get along well with others. We aren't violent. We have a good sense of reality. We have reasonable attention spans.

My daughters both loved TV during the preschool years. They make pretty decent preschool TV now and there's some educational value to some of it. I encourage the "good" TV, but I let them choose. We often watch together, but I'll admit that TV has helped me keep them busy when I've needed to have my attention elsewhere.

Now that Rachel is an adolescent, she doesn't like TV that much. She frequently chooses a different form of entertainment. She would rather do something more active. But, for all the TV she watched in the younger years, she's doing just fine. She's well adjusted and happy and I share the credit with TV.

5) Sugar
I never had a problem with my girls having sugary snacks as long as they ate a balance of healthy foods. As it happens, they both have always preferred fruits and vegetables to any other food group - including sweets. So, it's been easy to let them make their own choices. They are just as likely to pick brussel spouts as a snack as they are to pick a chocolate bar.

Television

Television Shows I think are Worth My Children's Time:

(This means I think they strike a good balance between entertainment value and education and that I've observed behavior indicating that my children have learned something applicable to their real lives from the show.)

Super Why
Pinky Dinky Doo
Scooby Doo
Little Bear
Dirty Jobs
Angelina Ballerina
Simpsons
Arthur
Wishbone
Ned's Declassified School Survival Guide
House
Wonderpets
Backyardigans
Power Puff Girls
Lizzy Maguire
Gilligan's Island
The Office
Little Einsteins
Facts of Life
Charlie and Lola
Fireman Sam
Noddy
Zoboomafoo
Stanley
Sponge Bob Square Pants

(Not all shows are appropriate for all ages.)

25 Random Thoughts

When you were in school, did you ever recycle a writing assignment by changing it slightly to suit the assignment for another class? And then another? Was it possible to just rewrite your interpretation of Wuthering Heights over and over?

So, a friend said, "Post something new on your blog." And it's now 11:41 pm and I'm tired because I stayed up until 3:30 am yesterday. Or something. I'm really too sleepy to figure it out.

And here we are... I'm recycling something from my facebook page and making it a blog post. I wonder if I'll still think it's a good idea tomorrow.

A List of 25 Random Facts About Me:

1) I love cats.

2) I love coffee.

3) I was once lost in the woods for several hours. Rescued by rangers on horses. A few weeks before I turned 11. (Anyone from Catlin remember that?)

4) My favorite snack is fresh avocado.

5) On my first date with my husband I had died my hair in purple and gold stripes. We went to a movie at the mall. It was March 1986.

6) When I was a little girl, my family and I lived in England for three years.

7) I know a lot about bats.

8) I can identify a lot of types of trees by their leaves and some by their bark.

9) My favorite piece of clothing is the dress I wore to Betsy's wedding.

10) I have the most loyal, funny, smart, pretty, thoughtful friends in the world.

11) My family is cool too. Seriously, I'm really lucky to have the amazing family that I do.

12) I've lived in 13 different places. (Permanent residences. That doesn't include moving around college or when we stayed with my grandparents for a few months.)

13) I was once snowed in alone for four days and had nothing to eat except leftover Kentucky Fried Chicken and water. And it should be noted that I think Kentucky Fried Chicken is gross and that by the end of the four days, it was four-day-old Kentucky Fried Chicken. I also only had access to local TV and I wasn't in my own place, so I only had the clothes and other things that I'd packed.

14) I'm really, really good at finding things. I can sometimes even help people find things over the phone.

15) I want to be friends with a vampire.

16) I make lists for everything.

17) At points in my adult life I wanted to have the following careers: Teacher, Movie Director, Neurologist, Detective

18) The ring tone on my phone when I first made this list was "Remember When" by Alan Jackson. Now it's "Need You Now" by Lady Antebellum

19) I really like candy, but I don't really like baked goods.

20) I'm slowly writing three novels. It's not hard to work on three novels at once when you only write four or five pages a year.

21) My dishwasher is my favorite appliance.

22) Halloween is my favorite holiday.

23) It makes me crazy when someone leave a message saying that they have something funny or interesting to share. And then, when you talk later, they can't remember what it was. Sometimes, when I get a message like that, I frantically call the person, even if I'm in the middle of something. I get so worried that they'll forget and I'll never know the thing they were going to say. Right Shana?

24) I'm good at higher math, but I have trouble counting and adding.

25) I used to be able to recite the entire movie, "Girls Just Want to Have Fun" from memory. I can still do it if I watch it once through to refresh.

Last Meal

Last Meal choices based on type of death...

If you are going to be electrocuted, you should choose something fried, but not to heavy. Like Fried Shrimp and French Fries. Or Fish and Chips. And I think a Creme Brulee would be a good dessert.

I think someone who is being hanged should pick some kind of noodle dish. Either spaghetti and meatballs or an Asian noodle dish.

For some reason, lethal injection makes me think of foods that have layers. I think it's because there's a series of injections. So, to me lethal injection calls for a really big sandwich with lots of stuff piled on. Or, Lasagna. And for dessert you would have to have a parfait.

A firing squad calls for something that is commonly hunted. Deer or quail or duck. Dessert should be a berry tart.

Candy

Here's a list of candy I like: Hershey's Bar, M&Ms, Heath Bar, Almond Joy, Twizlers, 3 Musketeers, Skittles, Tootsie Roll, Junior Mints, York Peppermint Patty, Sweet Tarts, Peanut M&Ms, Recces Peanut Butter Cups, Symphony Bar, and Smarties.

Morning Sickness Remedies

These are things I did to help with Morning Sickness (at any time of day). I was sick throughout both my pregnancies. Often more than once a day. For many months.

I found that sometimes one would work for a few days and then another for the next few days. Another week something that didn't work before would work at a different time.

Bottom line - you may want to try a remedy more than once as the weeks go by.

Good luck!

- The Liquid from a Can of Peaches in Heavy Syrup. Just drain the liquid into a plastic container and keep it in the fridge. When you feel nauseous, take a spoonful and try to swallow it in a gulp, not sips. It will stay fresh a few days.

- Weak Ginger Tea at Room Temperature

- Oyster Crackers, try letting them dissolve on your tongue

- Preggie Pops, these are lollipops that help with morning sickness. You can find them at http://www.onestepahead.com/ which is also a great web site for many other products.

- Lemon - you can sniff a fresh lemon or lick fresh lemon slices. You also can try sliced fresh lemon in room temperature water.

- Dry Cereal - Especially slightly sweet children's cereal that is vitamin fortified. I suggest Corn Pops and Fruit Loops.

The Way Other People Describe Me

This is a self-indulgent post. It's a list of things people have said about me that I like. As you read, remember that the you they refer to is actually me.





Thanks so much for being such a great sister. We joke about it a lot, but I really appreciate all the things you do for our family. You and I have always made a great team and I couldn't dream of a better sister.







If were stranded on a desert island, I think you would bring: One black bag with individual compartments to fit each: a gps, a satellite cell phone, the cruiseship/intercontinental shipping routes, and a planner so we could organize an efficient, comfortable and effective rescue. It would also fit snacks, a couple of drinks, a small sewing/first aid kit. The whole thing would roll out into a comfy bed with a selfcharging miniature generator to blow it up into a gigantic, yet practical puffy mattress, pillows, and light blankets, and provide night time light so we can wait in comfort for said boat to arrive. If I were stranded on a desert island, I think I would just bring you.

• 1. you play along with my silliness
• 2. you are always concerned about everything
• 3. you have a certain innocence that is so awesome
• 4. you don't condemn that which you are unfamiliar with

You could probably charm the stripes off a tiger.




You do have a gift of storytelling and finding humor in random and not so random things.


Hang in there, you may not feel it, but you are a strong woman...and that my friend is half the battle.